A deep throat story

by alittlehoneyformyheart

I just spent almost a week with the most harrowing sore throat ever! Dies. It got progressively worse after the three day period when it’s usually supposed to relent at which point my voice started reducing to a quack. Then a croak. For some reason, my voice just sounded really thick…and low.

Then after a few days, i just could no longer deny my need for a spit bucket. Classy.

It was so sad because it hurt so much just to even swallow my saliva (you know what i mean!) that i had to resort to just spitting in a plastic tumbler every half a minute or so. YEUGH

But last night after getting home from dinner i made a detour to my grandparent’s place. And oh my God, my grandma gave me this red and yellow capsule which she insisted would throw away the toxins in my body including the phlegm which was making me sound like tranny.

OH LAWD IT MADE ME SO NAUSEOUS THE ENTIRE NIGHT.

If you know me well, you’ll know that i’m not the kind of person who pukes easily. Not when i’m suffering from a three day hangover, not when i’m feeling queasy from a car ride, not from thinking of puppies being slaughtered while i’m eating a burger. Just no. It’s not from choice, it’s not really something i pride myself on. It just is that way.

Often when i puke it’s from really, really bad food poisoning (like that time at a party in Bangkok when i ate some bad tiramisu and after that vomited all over my hotel room carpet at 4 in the morning and had to clean it on my own. Yeah. Just…idk).

But for some reason, this pill made me retch and gag throughout the entire night. Oh God. And when i finally did the deed, it went on for absolute ageeees. I was stamping my foot and kicking the bathroom door behind me, it was that vigorous, y’guys. Eush.

It did the trick though! My throat has miraculously healed after hurting like a bitch for the past week every time i so much as opened my mouth to the point where i got an earache. I’ve got a slight cough now but nothing i can’t handle. Today has been good andddddd i’m on my 269th page of my Marian Keyes book  (“Last Chance Saloon”) since starting this morning.

Still got it! Taking it as a challenge to finish all 596 pages by tomorrow morning. YAY

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