Just a quick updatez on how hideous i am getting (not even in a funny way)
My self esteem is in tatters again. Nothing new there. It happens, shit happens.
I seem to have acne on my cheeks and it looks pretty grotesque
and i can’t seem to lose weight since i put on 4kgs in the past two months or so.
I feel embarrassed to look at myself in the mirror.
I wish i was anorexic but i can’t even manage that.
Instead i stuff and stuff my face with desserts and my arms have started to resemble tree trunks.
Huge, wide and cellulite-y. FUCKIN YUM
You know how you see an obese person sitting down and eating a chocolate bar or hugging the tin of Poppycock popcorn all to themselves on the couch?
And then you think, omg how do they not feel disgusted with themselves? Do they not realize how much weight they need to lose already?
Yeah well i’m that person now. Karma, you bitch.
I tell everyone that i’m on a diet or i need to be on one and then i find myself eating a cupcake and three slices of Vico cake and a strawberry gummy. And then i tell my boyfriend that the reason i ordered so much for dinner is because i haven’t eaten lunch all day (which is sort of true because a lunch constitutes a real meal but oh look see, there goes the obese bitch in my head again)!
I’m ugly. I need to be pretty. My life would be so perfect if i was skinny and had nice skin again.
I’m so sleepy now omg but keep on the look out again later for some more self hate yay